Cheatham County Sheriff's Office

  • Agency: Cheatham County Sheriff's Office
  • Address: 200 Court St, Ashland City, 37015 TN
  • Chief:
Phone: 615-792-4341

Cheatham County Sheriff's Office is located at 200 Court St, Ashland City, 37015 TN. The Cheatham County Sheriff's Office phone number is 615-792-4341.

Cheatham County Sheriff's Office News

WE ARE SCRUFFY BECAUSE WE WANT TO GIVE BACK TeamCheatham, Your deputies will be looking somewhat bearded this month because of a worthy cause. Each Deputy is donating money and allowed to grow beards. Donations go toward buying Thanksgiving dinners for many of our struggling families throughout the county. We would greatly appreciate any donation. We want to give as many people, young kids to lonely elders, a full meal by your blessing. Last year, your generosity was so amazing and we want to continue our giving to others. You can send your donation to Young Sportsmen Foundation in care of the Cheatham Sheriff’s Office, 200 Court Square, Suite 200 Ashland City, TN. 37015. As Always, Your Sheriff appreciates you beyond measure...

SHERIFF’S REPORT: EVERYBODY WAS FURNITURE FIGHTING! THE HAUNTING. You never know what’s going to happen when the weekend comes. Every call means a new request for our services. One thing about this gun and badge job is, nothing is ever routine. When you think your walking into routine, it quickly turns to heart pounding life and death seconds. We hate pursuits. It’s not like TV because life and death does indeed come into the mix. Machines made of metal and plastic accelerating away from other high powered machines with blue lights begins the gamble of winning for the rule of law or losing a life. Kingston PD was waiting for one that started in Nashville and as luck would have it, the car took the 188 exit and proceeded down toward the old Kingston hotel. Two thirteen year-olds behind the wheel were later delivered to the parents. Young criminals in training? The burglar alarm call was on Houston Fielder. Deputies showed up to an opened door and hoping a burglar wasn’t waiting. No burglar, just an inebriated homeowner sitting in the floor who was checked out and thanked for staying home. This has been a strange week with an in home death almost every day. All investigated by CID and EMS medical death investigators and so far, no foul play. We got the call of a male pushing a big couch down Misty Drive. The couch was slightly damaged by a Lazy Boy recliner that prematurely pulled out of another driveway. Deputy arrived in a motorized Sleep by Number cruiser and told the fighting furniture to exchange upolstery and get a room. There was an assault call in progress on Thomasville and deputies showed up asap. The victim alleged to be assaulted by his boss and the bosses son. The boss and the victim left the scene before our arrival leaving only the son who “ain’t fired nobody.” A corporate takeover was suspected but later found to be just a disagreement involving who locked who in the tipped over porta-potty and why blue liquid matters. Deputies are always on the prowl for dealers who dare cross into our county. This week Corporal Ivey and Deputy Mealer followed the vehicle. NATHAN WARREN hated to see those blue lights. WARREN fled off and allegedly threw some out and kept some too. Your servants recovered 13 grams of heroin and 5 grams of meth from “Dr. Let Me Kill You Real Good.” WARREN was apprehended by your patrolling drug warriors. HAUNTING: He drove down the long entrance while the wisterias lunged toward his cruiser. The farther he went the darker it seemed. Shifting to park, his boots crunched into gravel as he walked along the tall, dark windows. They were staring at him, he momentarily thought, but whispered to himself to stop it and stay focused... Climbing up the porch was a struggle in itself to keep his tunnel vision from taking him hostage. The door was partially opened which naturally beckoned his weapon to tactically draw. Then came the rustling. A movement that sounded more like sloshing, something wet. A pause followed with a metal sound, “What the hell is that?” he asked himself. The hallway offered no clues but invited him to come further. He always hated long houses and his haunted childhood memories didn’t help as he stared into the void. The sound was more defined now. It didn’t seem inside as much but toward the back yard. Looking down the narrow passage, a dim light barely peeked through an old screened door. A forward breeze heightened his nostrils. “Now that’s decomp” he thought. He knew the smell of rotting flesh all too much and it was somewhere close. There it was again. A sudden vibration in something thick. It sounded heavy now, struggling, like being trapped and mad. As he drew closer his steel front sights locked tighter for any threat. Looking not so much toward the swinging light, but the blackness surrounding it was rearing his personal dread. He silently struggled with his sanity as his hairs began to stand. Putrid flesh was closer now and the urgency to move forward or quickly retreat made every heartbeat pound harder in his brain. “Where the hell is my back-up?” he whispered. He forged slowly and stepped out to the back porch. The dim lightbulb slowly swayed back and forth on the dilapidated shed. But that light dared not shine near him. Stepping down, mud greeted his polished boots and so did the quick grasp wrapping around him. His guttural scream cued a regret of ignoring what his voices tried to tell him.. A “had to investigate” overruled and now sudden survival was the new bitter flavor in his mouth. As he pivoted, preparing to shoot, unbalance turned to falling into the stench of deep mud. This was not part of his training, firing under overwhelming odds. He never imagined he would be staring at a thing his mind didn’t understand. Far and deep in the back woods, muted gunshots matched his muffled screams. The tool sheds lonely light bulb slowly dimmed to blackness. And then there was silence. All of those childhood horrors, his adult nightmares and now agonizing insanity slowly enveloped him into dark matter. Staring into his fixed eyes, the haunting on Jackson Cabin slowly smiled back and hoped his backup would soon join them. A Belated Halloween Story...Now let’s kill some evil Thanksgiving Turkeys before they attack us all. Think gobble-safe TeamCheatham!

TOWN HALL MEETING TUESDAY! TeamCheatham, please join us Tuesday evening at the Gateway Church, Hwy 12, in Ashland City. Free dinner starts at 5:30pm and a get together discussion about our opioid epidemic in Cheatham starting at 6:00pm. If you have a family member or friend who has an drug or alcohol addiction, please swing by and meet people who can help out. Your sheriff would love to see you but will not ask you questions if your mouth is full of vittles and cornbread. Come join us Cheatham!!

DRUG TAKE BACK SUCCESS! Cheatham County Citizens delivered Saturday with our Drug Take Back by disposing of 250 pounds of prescription drugs! The breakdown was: AC-45 lbs PV-62 lbs KS-143 lbs Filling up seven barrels! Thank you everyone who came to meet officers, deputies and volunteers to make this day a drug disposal success! OPOID TOWN HALL THIS TUESDAY, 6PM GATEWAY CHURCH, AC, Come by and see your strange sheriff and his concerned friends in person!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: ROAD RAGE WHY? THIEVES WHERE? ERNEST WHO? Road rage can turn deadly in an instant. There are several unsolved homicides in the US all because two drivers got together, both grew offended at the other, tempers flared, cut offs escalated like two Amazon birds fighting for their wishful mate and someone ended up popping a cap at the other. Such a thing happened on I-24 when travelers passing through ended with windows shot out but thankfully this time, no dead bodies on interstate Cheatham. She walked out in the driveway and sat in her car. Maybe not remembering starting it or backing out onto the street. All she wanted to do was to drive to him because she missed him so. The car slowly rolled into the dark service center where old cars are fixed daily. How fitting she chose her destination to wait. A place where memories are renewed. In the middle of the night, alone, waiting, wonder turned to confusion. Someone took notice and Corporal Tidwell was asked to arrive and be her protector. Relatives were contacted while she was comforted. Dementia may have won out on that cold night but it’s ok, she will find him in the end because love always wins out. An unrest has been brewing on Lillard Williams and we could never figure out why. There is an old saying, “you can’t pick your neighbors but you can pick your nose; however, you can never pick your neighbors nose.” Neighbors began picking on each other and then we had to show up and separate all attempted nose pickers. Fights began and snot was slung but order was somewhat preserved. Thieves are on the prowl so everyone secure your stuff! A burglary in progress was interrupted this week by Sgt. Ethridge. Suspects led us to pursue but had to call it off. While looking for the suspects on Ridge Circle, the Sarge discovered a stolen skid loader. TAKE NOTICE: When Christmas gets closer, criminals start acting “un-santa like.” Please do not leave valuables in your car, in plain view. Nashville criminals like to visit Cheatham too.. They pulled up to the Twice Daily pump and just sat there. After 40 minutes, he should have made the decison whether he was going to pump regular or the V-power nitro plus into his three-legged impala. Maybe they were just waiting for Ernest, the gas attendant to pump their octane and check under the hood. Instead, they were serviced by a nosey deputy who ended up arresting the driver for possession of heroin and his passenger for multiple warrants in three counties. (Drug dudes, don’t sit at a Twice Daily, Mapco, or Sudden Service pumps for like, more than 12 minutes, it makes Ernest T. Bass very nervous) DRUG TAKE BACK HERE! Saturday, 10-2pm, PV Ren-mar, AC Walmart, KS Pharmacy...we want your drugs, bring them by on your way out to shop!! She sent her little boy off to school like every parent on any given day. She went back into her quiet home and in the silence, her thoughts must have been swirling while she wrote him the most eloquent letter of how much she loved him, how she could have been a better mom, and that she will always look over him. For her own reason, she chose herself over everyone and everything on this given day. With no father in his life, and recently losing her dad, it had to be a crushing blow that the only father figure her little one knew was permanently gone. So, all he had was his mommy and all he wanted was to be loved even more, go to school, play with his friends and come home to her waiting arms. But, no one knew of her own private struggle. She drifted elsewhere and eventually, into the bathroom where self-violent death came quick. Her searing words in ink was her promise to look over him from heaven. Authority figures later made their dreaded presence. Others gently took his hand and held him close through the soft sobs. Sometimes, our defined duty as teachers, protectors and counselors is often rewarding but on that day, so gut wrenchingly unbearable. Our thoughts and prayers have been with him because he lost his everything on that sunny morning this week. For those of you thinking about suicide, there are other ways to find help when you think there is none. Let us help lead you away from this selfish finality. Please, just call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or text connect “741741” Love your children a little more this weekend TeamCheatham. Life is good, crazy and so short.

WE WANT SOME DRUGS! TeamCheatham Citizens, this Saturday, Oct. 27 is our annual DRUG TAKE BACK! We want your old drugs you have laying around that don’t need to be: 1. Flushed down the toilet. 2. Given to drug hungry opioid zombies. 3. Dumped in the Cumberland that will kill all of the carp (Because Carp Lives Matter) Three locations this Saturday from 10am-2pm to serve your drug disposal needs: PLEASANT VIEW: REN MAR PARKING LOT: 10-2 ASHLAND CITY WALMART FRONT SIDEWALK: 10-2 KINGSTON SPRINGS PHARMACY PARKING LOT: 10-2 Seriously, we will be happy to dispose of your prescription drugs. We cannot accept any liquids or stalks of marijuana over 6 feet.

SHERIFF’S REPORT: ICHABOD, DISMAL, ARMPITS & IGNORANT EVIL The call came into us that she was missing. People go missing for all kinds of reasons and the first thing we do is learn everything about who they are, what’s going on in their life and what life changes they have had, all the while knowing time is most vital. She had several things going on. Hours past, overnight came and went. The next day we kicked into high gear by calling in other agencies along with air support. She was found close to the end of the Narrows. Cold, wet, broken cell phone, scratched up but otherwise, thankfully alive. We are only as successful as the surrounding counties who assist us and who we assist. A Montgomery County deputy asked us for help and naturally we were on our way. The suspicious driver was found to have warrants. He got very nervous and hightailed it into the dark woods where tales abound of headless horsemen. Leaving his car in the middle of the road proved an irritating obstacle for passing travelers. While the wrecker was doing its hooking up, Deputy Hawkins was dutily directing other chariots. Creepingly slow, he eyed a passing carriage chauffeuring a nervous looking passenger with darting eyes, red ears and a “bobbling Ichabod Crane like adam’s apple” who happened to be that guy. The bug-eyed oaf didn’t get the chance to hike in the woods a second time and exclaimed all the way to “ye olde jail” he was happy to still have his head. The driver on Sweet Home collided with another car. Deputies arrived and found he moved his car around the back of a house (Gloomy). He did not want a report written but the nervous ash of his dangling cigarette made the deputy all the more inquisitive. Of course, no report was wanted because he was driving on revoked (Grim). But there was more. A closer inquiry revealed Montgomery county was looking for him the day before for two domestic assaults (Dismal). We have lots of public service requests. Some include our own internal concerns from citizens who are convinced we are doing very diabolical things to them. Often times, your sheriff gets complaints about the Ashland City Police Chief. For instance, he is sometimes suspected of tracking cars by satellite and zooming in on the person's vehicle identification number in order to control their every move by zapping his french sonic beams under their armpits (Quite likely) Your sheriff is often left with voice messages (going on four years), that myself and Judge Maxey are trying to take away people’s homes by pumping gas in them. We are also alleged to be doing unmentionable things to inmates, using them for our bloodsport games in our underground Roman jail colosseum we are operating (We do not confirm or deny). And then we get the more milder concerns like people reporting their animals not behaving and snarkily barking back at them. Some request a deputy to come and threaten them with dog jail or worst, the most ghastly “dog house.” This week, it was reported someone was sneaking into her home while she was away and giving her dog, yummy sweet treats and then leaving. (Suspects include the sheriff, Judge Maxey, and the chief) He allegedly assaulted and pushed his wheelchair bound father over and decided to steal his car. The call was put out and JOE FRANCIS (1st pic) was quickly surrounded by ACPD and deputies. FRANCIS was charged with robbery, domestic assault and driving on revoked. (Honor thy father and mother Joe and get off the drugs) An alleged aggravated rape was reported this week and before deputies arrived, the suspect fled into the woods. Springfield Police assisted by sending their tracking K-9 down. After two hours, Lt. Heflin spotted the suspect, LANNY MARKLAND (2nd pic) who is a Fugitive from Justice out of West Virginia (hiding here in our town!) MARKLAND holds a degree in “Very Violent Criminal” and remains in custody as our investigation continues. A whirlwind of a week for TeamCheatham and teamwork of all who wears the uniform got the job done. Banding together makes criminals a little more nervous and upsets their concentration when they see us around. Feel a little more safer knowing your men and women will stand in to protect you and stand in the way of ignorant evil. Celebrate the weekend, good people, in our wonderful Kingdom of Cheatham! (YIKES, got a little wordy this week)

SHERIFF REPORT: HIGHWAY ROBBERY, X’s & O’s, PIG RAGE, and METRO MADNESS Another crazy week with 98% of good people going to work, school and just living their lives. The two percenters on the other hand were out during the day and night making victim’s lives difficult by stealing stuff, burglarizing their work shed and keeping us busy following up on their criminal behavior. A seventeen and eighteen year old pair swung over from Murfreesboro to commit a not so cool Highway Robbery on 70. They underestimated your Cheatham deputies probably thinking we are a bunch of tobacco chewing good ole boys who don’t know squat. Their perception of us was quickly recalculated and the dungeon of disappointment had beckoned them to stay a little longer in the Kingdom. We had a “Be on the Lookout” for a man driving very badly on Bandy along with belching out foul language. He was later observed throwing Taco Bell trash on Trouble Rd, ranting on about his hatred of illegal armadillos and stale crunchy supremes. The potty-mouthed, butt sore scratching of a man was put on our list to be early checked as naughty or nice. “Mr. Taco Hater” needs to understand that Feliz Navidad is around the corner and we have no patience for his taco racist ways. Plenty of domestics this week and for the most part, we are the only shield between his temper and her final pleas of help. An ex-girlfriend and ex-boyfriend on Scruggs were Xing it out until we got there to put the final kabash on their X’s and O’s. You touch her in a violent manner gentlemen and to jail you go where Bruno the kisser will share his cell with you. We take domestic violence very seriously. A SECOND REQUEST and shout out to TRAILER OWNERS. Please secure you trailer guys and girls, no matter if it’s open, enclosed, flat or boxed. Drug seeking thieves have been on the prowl while we sleep so please make if as difficult as can be for burglars, stealers, scalawags and shamsters. Your sheriff and deputies hate it when you stuff “gets swiped.” Also, any identifying serial numbers need to be logged down so when we come across a suspicious stash of trailer tongues, we can check them by the numbers. If we can’t prove it’s your trailer, they get off trailer free. If pigs would only stop trying to hog up 911 dispatchers, so we could go after real swine.. One cute little 80 pounder freed itself from its backyard paradise and began an unspeakable rampage on 41A at Village Square. It may have started as an innocent intent of just visiting neighbors but quickly escalated into bacon fueled accusations. Pleasant View Police along with Deputy Peeler tried to snort some sense into the pigster. They finally calmed it saying a neighbor was just preparing “vegrtarian turkey nuggets,” not, well, you know.... THE CALL BY EYEWITNESSES WHO SAW SOMETHING EVIL: She was screaming as he forced her into the car. The caller reported an abduction and a second witness called 911 as he was following them. Help was begged for. THE PURSUIT: ACPD was the first to make contact handing the chase over to Cheatham Deputies Lyttle and Hawkins. Lyttle was forced out of the fight and only Deputy Hawkins stayed in the pursuit. THE DRIVER: Upped his insane recklessness by causing near head-ons, close calls with scrambling pedestrians and sideswiping anything that got into his way.. It finally ended in Antioch and miraculously, with no injuries. THE HELP: Metro Officers along with their helicopter support all performed heroically. Their unwavering determination to help a lone deputy stop an evil career criminal before he hurt others has not gone unnoticed by we citizens in Cheatham. Have a wonderful weekend because fall is in the air and fresh Halloween candy will soon be peddled on the streets of Cheatham. We anticipate candy corn domestics in the coming weeks. Music on Main all day Saturday! Come and enjoy Cheatham’s Home Talent 9am-6pm!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: THIEVERY ABOUNDS, METH UP TRAILER HITCH & EVIL FINALLY STOPPED When GrandPa's go Prolific: The grandkids did it again. They forgot to put up their bikes so Gramps walked over, powerlifter the pedals above his head, slung them across the yard followed by a painful scream. Probable hemorrhoidal proliferation possibly followed but we hoped not. GrandMa came out, settled everybody down and made Pops go lay down while she began making his Preparation...H that is. As posted earlier in the week TRAILER THEFTS have been reported so lock them down owners! A trailer taken from Woodlands Drive had its own tale to tell. The poor little trailer that could was discovered in the dark and all alone near the East Kingston railroad tracks. We suspect the thief failed to properly secure the little trailer that didn’t want to go. In haste to make his getaway, it must have popped off their little hitch. The victim’s driveway uncovered other evidence including a newly purchased baggie of meth. His blue crystal possibly slipped out from “Badger’s” prison saggy pants while bending over to snag that quick cash for more meth. A suspicious person call on Hwy 70 turned out to be a staggering citizen holding his Colt 40 paper bagged beer. Oatmeyer stated he was trying to get away from aggressive fawns and Cedar Hill turkeys that attack with prejudice. He was taken to a safe place for his protection from gangsta gobblers. A burglar alarm at the Kingston pharmacy turned into the real deal with four suspects stealing their favorite opioids. County Investigators were called to the scene and are still working it. Any information about these hooligans would be greatly appreciated. Your information will remain confidential. DOWN RIGHT GUT-WRENCHING: The first murder was the continuation of his own selfish making as the couple walked in on him. They had to be in disbelief why this burglar decided to cut their throats and set them on fire...all for what? Stuff? He left them to horribly suffer and die needlessly. And then onto his second murder of another good person who just wanted to live life and enjoy his grandkids. Cheatham deputies along with ACPD officers saddled up and rushed to Montgomery and Stewart counties to help stop his evil ways. Many surrounding sheriffs, chiefs and local agencies from everywhere converged as well. The challenge of heat, briars and thickets were often times unbearable but never slowed their resolve. Evil was finally spotted and quickly apprehended by the good Henry County Sheriff and his corporal. A somber end to the week but evil will never win out as long as you believe in us. There is true goodness in people. Your servants saw it all week when neighbors and communities came together to reject this evil.. Enjoy the weekend TeamCheatham because life is so good and way too short.

TRAILER THEFT ALERT! Citizens, we have been struck by trailer thieves up north and down south in Cheatham. Some property has been recovered after criminals abandoned trailers with thick chains or stubborn anchors still attached. Please record your trailer make, model and serial number if it has one. Photograph any other yard stuff you believe valuable even though your significant other may think otherwise. Also secure your trailer by any means necessary to help us improve their chances to our Kubota Jail. Any front door visitor you deem suspicious includes people under the pretense of soliciting something or needing help finding their "miniature pot belly chicken." If it "just don't look rite" you can call our professional dispatchers @ 615-792-2098. DON’T MAKE IT EASY FOR THESE TRAILER THIEVING TATER TOADS TEAM CHEATHAM!!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: WHEN THORNS ATTACK, BIRD SCOOTER MAYHEM & AMAZING SRO’S Weekend calls were plenty and here’s just a snippet: An unspeakable theft of somebodies golf clubs caused such stunned silence in the club, you could hear a golf tee weep.. A male with an axe (but hopefully not to grind) on Creek View was reported but not discovered. A vicious pitbull named Poindexter allegedly bit a guy on Sidney Fambrough Rd. “Pointy” defended itself by woofing that Sidney accused him of having a sissy name thus, by state statute, one bite to the calve was permissible, so he growled. A weekend jail fight sent everyone in to restore order. This continues to remind us that the overcrowding and tensions are a daily worrisome burden. Cheatham Correctional officers do the best they can to stand between anarchy and inmate order. Suspicious persons were reported on OCP just turned out to be teenagers walking suspiciously around showing off their suspicious teen attitudes. The male was reported staggering down Petway, initiating a verbal confrontation with the unassuming briar bush. A call came in about him and the man was subsequently discovered with lots of little cuts. He was asked where the scratches on his arms and between his toes came from. Nervousness quickly turned to defensiveness and emotions took over. Scratchy man began spewing racist remarks about thorns in general. He also maintained a social justice stance by accusing deputies of being “Petway pedestrian haters.” There was a young man with a gun on Justice who barricaded himself while making death threats. Sheriff notified, SWAT activated and the alert heightened. Thank you Sgt. Ethridge for taking the initiative, showing compassion and helping this troubled soul to his needed destination (to not jail, but treatment). JUSTIN SUMNER was wanted for an alleged aggravated assault on Ross Hollow. After much searching along with determination, Deputy Hawkins found SUMNER with drugs and two thousand dollars of suspected counterfeit money! (Not a good start when the deputy discovered fake twenties with Andrew Jackson’s profile looking eerily similar to a surprised Andy Cordan right before his speeding bird scooter running over Neil Orne). Great job Deputy ManHawker!” Deputies were summoned to Bearwallow because the domestic had upped its ante to violent furniture destruction. She was tearing up mom’s house because mama wouldn’t support her financial need for illicit self-medicating drug research. She had been up for four days straight but denied it could have been the meth. It was blamed on evil capitalists companies peddling Starbucks coffee and stale Dunkin Donuts she happened to come across in Ms. Dunkerly’s dumpster . Our teachers and children need them. Your sheriff and citizens demanded them. And most everyone agreed in this age of unpredictable madness, the one place that should unquestionably be safe, now isn’t. Eight new Cheatham SRO Officers (Pic above) were sworn in this week to join the others and begin their training to be mentor, protector and your child’s law enforcement friend. Your sheriff began his county service four years ago with many goals to work toward. First, pursuing the drug dealing criminals who had free reign way too long saw the beginning their accountability by our brave men and women. Many are currently sitting in jail or prison and others have left the county afraid of what’s waiting for them if they return. This first goal arrived and continues everyday. Secondly, building a successful SRO program for every student was our next top directive. This is my unrelenting belief because we owe it to them, their parents and our dedicated teachers. All any mom and dad want is simple solace knowing we are committed to protecting their any cost. Because of you, deputies are quickly preparing for their respective mission. Thank you Molly Hutchens, Dr. Beck, Mayor McCarver and especially our honorable county commissioners who put up with so much of my harassment. We do after all, love our kids and grandkids beyond measure. Have a beautiful fall weekend good TeamCheatham citizens!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: FIRES, FOOLISH BOYS & THERE GOES THE NEIGHBORHOOD The fire started shortly after he fell asleep on Groves Drive. It may have been from his cigarette not put out as he went to sleep or maybe just something faulty. He barely made it out but barely counts because he lives. His house was a total loss but so what? Things can be put back, cigarettes should be put out and his own breath can only be replaced by no one else. The deputies had to pull them over on Ridge Circle because one was spotted and wanted. Two others in the car were wanted as well but their drugs were not wanted in our county. Their freedom was forfeited and their poison confiscated as well. There was a fight on Doty Dr. and the vehicle was stopped on Bell St. JIMMY BINKLEY was driving but without the proper papers. He has a history of drugs in a school zone. Drugs were found on him again and he was promptly taken into custody only to be served with an outstanding order of protection. JIMMY needs jail time. The kid on Elkmont didn’t like the fact that he had to abide by his parents rules so he decided to call the police. The deputy arrived and listened to the babble of junior feeling threatened by his parents because he had to follow their rules. The teenager was advised that as long as he lived in his parents house, eat their food, use their electricity, they make the rules dude! (Circa 1982: A teenager who defied his parents and complained to an officer about their rules would have rethought his stand for social justice by getting an “attitude re-adjusticed.” Parents, stop being your kids best friend by letting them “drink or smoke weed as long as they do it at home.” They already have plenty of best friends for that. They expect you to be the law. Be their unconditional love, balanced with conditions above all else…Circa 2018) The house was yanked from its roots in west Nashville after decisions were made, for some reason, that a new settlement should be in the deep outposts of the Ranchettes. Surveys were surveilled, measurements were measured and the old home with a new journey began. While most slept, the house meandered down Pegram’s 70, strolled through Kingston and turned up the Merry Lane of all Logs. When pulling a homestead monolith of shingles and eaves, precautions are suppose to be made not to snap wires or crush birdhouses on this summers twilight. The house slithered around the snake turns as deputy watchmen escorted this safety hazard. Morning came, astonishment followed, and tempers quickly flared with the Ranchette Ranchers rightfully protesting. The mover is responsible for all tree splinters, mauled mailboxes and avalanching hippie rock art (Sorry Glenn) Any damages incurred, please call the mover who stated he would be happy to repair: DON TOOTHMAN, 615-579-0755... There’s nothing that makes your sheriff more proud to see than your amazing men and women who suit up and go into the jungle of danger every day. The next call is always the one that may define his resolve. The next traffic stop could be the test of her will, by overcoming her overwhelming odds. We are here because we choose to stand between those who take life and we who love everything about saving a life. Have a very safe weekend TeamCheatham and boys, mind your mommas!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: NEGLECTFUL IDIOT, NIGHT NINJAS & WHAT THE “H” BOB? The weekend started out with a fatal hit and run on New Hope. We assisted THP in locating the suspected runner, running him back to the scene. Something about last weekend brought out “overdosers” and we had our unfortunate share. One addict died on Honeysuckle, another had the stupidity to ask for her illegal drugs back. The deputy promptly replied, “yes ma’am, just meet me at the booking room door.” Then there was MICHAEL MINTON (1st pic) Being his weekend to watch over his precious toddler, he allegedly shot up with heroin and subsequently went into a death spiral. His concerned partying drug buddies didn’t help any by not wanting the cops called. A concerned bystander did anyway. Deputy Temple quickly arrived and began saving his dying body with Narcan. MINTON began a new life of light again but was combative because First Responders interrupted his high. He later became more distressed when we charged him with child abuse and neglect. “MINTON, you’ve made it to the bottom, now get yourself clean, if only for your beautiful child”...(your concerned sheriff) Our latest DUI checkpoint Saturday night resulted in successful drug and alcohol arrests. Deputies enjoy being a part of something to insure your safety. Many traffic stops this week, some were cited, most were warned with a smile and a few naughty enough to be sent to “the institution.” ATTENTION NIGHT WALKERS! Some of you like to prance along busy highways, enjoying the pitch darkness in your black ninja/goth/mettalica attire. It’s a sure bet you’re going be on the next “Live PD Roadkill” episode. We receive several calls of people in black being almost hit. Please wear light-colored clothing or stay off the moonless roadways “nocturnal knuckleheads!” Deputies tire of your lack of common sense... He was released from jail and sent home with his belongings. He must have really missed the old pokey. Sometimes later, the call was dispatched about a man dressed like a lanky pumpkin walking down River Rd. carrying a “schtick.” Deputy Key caught up to the “oranged-up” ex-inmate, carrying not a stick but an ax! He was promptly “disarmed and de-oranged” after it was learned the official “Cheatham Jail” scrubs were accidentally placed in his personal bag. “Inmate man” protested that the roadside undressing violated his civil rights because nobody washed his dirty clothes when he got out of the slammer. He additionally exclaimed there’s nothing better than jail scented dryer sheets. We calculated the probability of his return: 98.4%. DEVIN BROWN (2nd pic) allegedly hit a utility pole, mailbox and tree on Petway this week. After leaving his destruction, he fled the scene. BROWN called the sheriff’s office wanting to file a report that his vehicle was stolen but we knew better. Shortly thereafter, BROWN allegedly set his mother’s house on fire in an attempt to cover up his crimes and play the victim. The only victim’s are the ones he left in his wake, even his own mother. It’s so adorable and cute on little kids. But a grown “arse man” wearing a halloween mask and walking down the road seven weeks before Halloween is unsettling to most home dwellers. Don’t come crying to us when citizens throw eggs and sling fire blazing paper bags of poop at you. Knock it off Freddie Krueger! A CHILLING TRUCK-MARE: Dad was backing the boat trailer steering his very nice Ford F-350 into the waters edge. Wife and kids waited patiently in the floating family vessel and heard daddy holler “Uh Oh!” Now, rumor has it, it could have been his fault but that’s up for a future Chevy/Ford debate. He jumped out safely while the dimming headlights stared at him disappointedly, as if asking, “What the hell Bob?” Deputies arrived and Corporal Johnson “scuba suited up” for the retrieval. Campers, onlookers along with seven white-tail deer strolled to the scene carrying their lounge chairs, coolers and salt licks in anticipation to watch the show. The watery resurfacing was met with ooohs, ahhhs, deer heckling and an awkward, uncomfortable silence between a drowned truck and its “in the doghouse owner...ouch!” Even though Labor Day has passed, be safe on the water ways hikers, campers, boaters, fishermen and hunters. We will be around to help you in all your safety needs and keep the deer at bay with their condescending attitudes. Have a great weekend TeamCheatham!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: GRANNIES GONE WILD? DUNKIN DONUT DREAMIN’ ...HER ENDING He walked into the Dollar General to purchase some vienna sausage and a limited offer of cherry flavored diet RC. But, there it was, too gosh durned irresistible, not to mention shiny as a hiney. So what if it may have been a little smarter than he, he wanted it anyway. He stole the smartphone and out the door he scooted. The deputy pulled up and was invited to look at the DG surveillance video, quickly identifying him as Willard Ringworm. “Worm” was tracked down, caught one-handed with the other well, you know,, while trying to figure out how to open a “hot grannies gone wild” website… A reckless driver on Highway 70 turned out to be an elderly female feeling reckless along with being hot and bothered for Henry. Then a personal injury wreck on Craggie Hope. This was a no brainer if you drive fast on that windy snaky road, get ready to bite the trees that beckon you. Come and drive this scenic roadway TeamCheatham, but no speeding, texting or armadillo teasing. A strange acting female at the PV Dunkin Donuts made nervous people call 911 dispatch. She was checked out and after an earlier encounter with her sister, “Mary Jane,” along with an overpowering craving for donuts plus 3.7 ounces of Cheetos, she was deemed ok with a designated driver. Even brown trucks that deliver brown packages get stuck in brown mud sometimes. We showed up on Little Marrowbone to assist our UPS friend. It was better than the time when Mr. FedEx stepped out in the driveway while black suited sunglass Feds were waiting. Someone’s Ex came running out, threw a skillet at the Feds but hitting the passing DHL guy instead. The nearby USPS lady choked on her skoal witnessing the ordeal while closing the beat up mailbox. All Amazon packages were delivered on time nonetheless. We may never know the misery she was going through on Old Butterworth. Her child was taken away last month and just a few days ago she was stopped by a deputy, cited for driving on revoked. Of course, not a reason to end it all. What led up to her ending may have started with that first drug. She probably took her first hit way back when to fit in, to be cool with her friends...maybe because she wanted to feel good, or just escape the pain no one but her knew about. Her downward spiral had to be heartbreaking to those one who loved her but hated what became more important to her. And now, here we go again with another joining the club of the lost boys and girls to that death potion called opioids… A mess on Thursday. We need the rain but not the mad wind kicking over our invested trees. Especially when the wind thinks it’s funny to block Hwy 12 traffic both ways while everybody just wanted to go home. CHEATHAM TAKE NOTICE: We will be out more than ever this Labor Day weekend insuring the “UI’s” don’t become DUIs. If your drinkin’ don’t be a drivin’ a friend, mom, mean brother or drunk uncle but only if he’s not drunk. Better yet, don’t call anybody whose name begins with “Drunk,” “Shakes,” or “Budweiser.” We had a full courtroom Thursday night when new and old office holders came together. Each promised to be good servants and your representative voice. Your sheriff renewed his commitment to make Cheatham safer every day and we still have lots of work to do. We know we will get there because we have all of you-TeamCheatham, Happy Labor Day!!!

CREEKER’S BALL “CREEKING GREAT!” The 33rd anniversary “Creeker’s Ball” was held on Saturday. The first one since 1990 when way back then, Ole Sheriff Weakley shut the last one down because “Crawdad Calvin” sliced up the sheriff’s whitewalls (true story). Creekers from Pond, Sycamore, Brush, Dry, Sam's, Turnbull, and even west Nashville Richland Creekers partook in good food and great music. Your sheriff was present and so happy no tires were flattened and most guns and brass knuckles kept in the cars. The atmosphere was laid back and very entertaining with amazing talent on the stage in the day long event. Well done Mike Loftis, Staffers and Commissioner Creeker Diana! On Tuesday Mr. Loftis met with the Sheriff and Chief Tim Binkley and presented $1000.00 for this Christmas’ Fraternal Order of Police "Shop with a Cop." Our humble appreciation and we are excited more kids will have a wonderful day courtesy of you TeamCheatham Creekers!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: WET TOILET PAPER AND KICKING A DOOR TO SAVE HIM The car swerved on OCP near Bearwallow so of course, a checking out was in order. The deputy asked the twenty-year old to score his own sobriety by a few pop-tests. The youthful lad started his DUI history way too soon. There’s nothing fun about having to start a twenty somethings record. Young men of Cheatham, think smart before you start behind the wheel! Call somebody to come and get you! The call was reported to us as “Dispatch Priority One.” Grandmother was allegedly driving a lowrider cross-tagged and bouncy slammed. She lip synced to the deep bass reverbnation from the whimsical lyrics of “Lil Wayne.” On her way to an unknown high stakes house, we got the call. Her habit of gambling had gone too far for her grandson. He was just fed up with her reckless dice throwing and asked us to intervene. It could have been sunnier on Sunnyfield if not for the neighbors fighting over someone’s cat climbing up a fence. The cat meowed its climbing was needed to catapult itself away from the impending cataclysm brought on by neighbors catcalling each other. The cat was safely placed in a Cadillac to catnap. (Cats are always to blame for starting catfights) THE TROUBLE WITH CRIMINALS: They decided to make a stand and “trashed us big.” It started in A-dorm with a shout out to inmate solidarity. Industrial toilet paper, saturated with sewage water, made into gobs of paper blobs slung into windows, cameras and overhead jail lights. The toilets were then clogged with water gushing out into the sallyport and on our waiting boots.. While the skinheads chanted “Death to Breedlove!” deputies, investigators, Chief Binkley, Ashland City officers, Pleasant View Chief Wheeler and of course, your sheriff showed up. We stacked up behind each other for the surge toward them while they challenged us with their indignant yells. The door was slung open and muscled inmates were tight-fisted ready to put up a fight...until they met us coming for them. They quickly felt the strong arm of the law, quietly relented and accepted our win over their stupidity. Order was quickly restored as each inmate was brought out handcuffed. The clean-up was frustrating and maddening. However, I’ve never been more proud to see “all the men in charge” picking up mops and squeegees to restore the order you citizens expect. They lost their privileges and understood their testing of us was a failure for them. This poorly built “workhouse” that houses the most hardened of criminals needs another place for them because we are holding on the best we can, sometimes by luck. My guttural fear is one of us is going to get seriously hurt or worse. The clock is ticking, we need your support.. Suicides are on the rise and has been in the last four years. The call was sent to Deputy Hawkins that the girlfriend who was breaking up got an earful from him. He then told her he was going to do it and said goodbye. She heard a thud and then silence. Hawkins and Deputy Dahianna came as back up to save a life. The order was given to kick in the door because minutes mattered. He was waiting for us, angry, seething and cursing your servants who forced their way in to simply save his butt. This angry man wanted us to shoulder the blame for all of his problems. We made sure he was not suicidal and then departed to the next emergency call. We hope your weekend is full of no emergencies or cat calling. Stay safe and love, love, love yourself and the ones around you TeamCheatham!

SHERIFF’S REPORT: JACKING OF THE JAW AND BREAKING OF THE CARS The things that happen in Cheatham are stranger than discovering Uncle Bob’s collection of toenails, including his aqua tinted ones (when he went through that phase). Deputies are called upon to mediate disagreements that led to drunk people bustin somebody’s mouth and jacking Junebug’s jaw cause she said he had it comin’ Ok, we need to address the animal issues. There was a dog dispute on Little Marrowbone and the dog in question hiked his leg on the deputies new clean tire. Bessie the Bull came out of the closet on Neptune. He was escorted back to the girls. Another cow was reported in the Harpeth and suspected to be stuck in the mud. Sadly she laid down and drowned before we could get to her. The horse on the roadway on OCP daring the horse-powered carriages to race him. He was led back to his Steeplechase.. People are shooting their guns all over the county. Listen up shooters! Shoot your gun in a safe manner and in a safer direction where no neighbors are threatened. Don’t be shooting after dark while holding a Jack Daniel’s in one hand and sobbing because she left you. She left you because you preferred Jack over her. The female was walking alone on the dangerous Bearwallow curves (Stop thinking bad thoughts about Bearwallow, especially you Ed) She was picked up by a Cheatham protector and taken to her safe destination. Neighbors are disputing on Francis Ct. We were called to mediate. Father and son-in-law issues on Rustling Oaks. (I miss the days of cleaning my guns while my daughter’s new beau stared nervously) Her brother was lost and she was very worried. At the age of 79, dementia was slowly taking his life’s achievements away. He was trying to find her but we found him first. She was brought to him and he’s safe again thanks to Cheatham and Ashland City Protectors. Who in the “turd tarnation” decides to dump their nasty trash near the Dollar General at OCP? Should dumping your “schmitt” because you’re too stupid lazy to take it to the the landfill be your first choice? Maybe a slow execution by fire ants will show you some civic responsibility of proper trash disposal. Your thoughts please. We have two deputies assigned to picking up after Cheatham’s trash throwers. That drives me crazy because so many discard their nasty drawers everywhere. It’s so difficult for a father to give up his son who is criminally wanted. We knocked on the door on Mosley Ferry because we knew he was there. Dad indicated he was but his love overcame his willingness to relent. As a parent we understood. But, justice is blind and we swore to uphold her rules. The son came out of hiding to face the weight of her scales. Many citizens this week just needed to talk to deputies for advice and we are humbled to give you guidance. CAR ALERT: Several cars have been broken into this week, especially in the Robertson Co. and Pleasant View area. There are crews from Clarksville and Nashville who are out creeping for your belongings. Lock you house and car doors, don’t leave your belongings in plain view, take your keys and fobs in the house. Thieves are also stealing trailers and ATV’s. Don’t make it easy for these crooks to take your stuff! The Ranchettes is known as the outermost maze of roads in Cheatham where deputies go in but find it difficult to navigate their way out. Your sheriff lives in the mysterious forest as well and reminds visitors “you can check out anytime but you can never leave”. Often time calls come from the thousands of people who love living there. The pig loves living way back in the Ranchettes on a road named Whippoorwill. She’s always excited to harass the horse living ten houses down. Neighbors continually scold the pig to go back to its pen. Deputies arrived to put the pig in its place but not before the alleged drunk pig owner showed up. He had to be arrested for DUI with the smell of pork rinds on his breath. It’s “Climb-a-Truck” time in PV. this Saturday. Bring your kids by the Sheriff’s Monster Trucks. Ice pops will be waiting to be slurped. May you find your way to a safe and fun weekend TeamCheatham!

A REMINDER TO THEM, A TRIBUTE TO HER The week actually began last weekend when the group of seasoned criminals were finally nabbed on Monday. As the adrenaline subsided and reality sunk into their orange outfits, the words to investigators why they did, what they did was quite pathetic but encouraging. One alarming bode of information was they felt more comfortable committing their crimes in Nashville because punishment is light and acceptable to most criminals They added Cheatham’s law enforcement and prosecutors scare them because we are too harsh about making criminals responsible for what they do. They quickly realized after the pursuit, it wasn’t Metro on their tail, it had to be Cheatham and THP. One addict even relented that drug dealers don’t want to come to Cheatham anymore because of the risk of being caught. That statement was the best compliment and a testament to what our goal is and what citizens demand! We will continue with our message to criminals, please leave, or “you’ve got to change your evil ways, baby.” The ringleaders bond was set at $300,000. Maybe we can keep him this time. The correctional deputy lingered outside alone after eight arduous hours of being incarcerated with them. She breathed in the free air of Cheatham before making way to her car. The mean and lost boys who are anxious about their captivity, always try her to bend to their requests. She is glad it’s time to go home and shower off the incarcerated memory. An inmate’s job is to get the girl deputies to be weak for them, always without success. Female deputies have an additional challenge with a majority of male bad boys. Sadly for them, the girls are much smarter than the cons. She rolled up to her home in the government assigned cruiser and pulled the handle up to park. Closing her eyes for few more moments while her husband started the kids on homework, her breath exhaled out the crazy day. Another shift over meant they were waiting for a dinner she was scheduled to prepare. She shed her cape and left it in the car for another day. A twelve hour shift is so hard on the body and even more draining on the mind. All of the girls have a connection with all of the guys on their shifts. They take comfort knowing these muscled men would move a mountain to get to them when a criminal challenges her authority.. She is one of four, who this week helped Sgt. Brady in his trek across America to bring awareness to our physically and mentally wounded warriors. They lost a lot of blood thousands of miles away but she happened to be here along with other deputies to help in their journey. They want to heal on American soil with their fellow veterans. These are the few who came to this Sheriff’s Office and asked for the chance to do the most difficult job ever. The strong women who took on the challenge to protect us from evil. The others who watch over the gotten ones are a unique group of sisters. This is the meaning of girl power. This is...TeamCheatham. Have a wonderful weekend citizens.

A DAY OF CHEATHAM GOOD WINNING OVER RUTHLESS EVIL Cheatham, Davidson and Robertson counties have been on the hunt for DENVER TAYLOR and his crew for two months now. TAYLOR was out on bond for an earlier home invasion and robbery in Cheatham when he started up again and “upped the ante” with a violent domestic assault. DENVER is suspected in several thefts of vehicles, stealing one and then going to another. He has been especially busy in Metro where he’s allegedly stolen vehicles, a boat, box trailer purse snatchings, drug purchases and assaults. This weekend he allegedly stole a seventy thousand dollar boat, truck and a trailer with equipment belonging to the group Little Big Town and brought them to Cheatham to hide. His crime spree was becoming intense and this weekend your Cheatham deputies, Robertson Co, 23rd Task Force and THP banding together to apprehend him. On Monday morning he was spotted by Cheatham Investigators in Joelton who were assisted with THP troopers and their helicopter. TAYLOR was determined get away at any cost. We knew he was on the path to hurt or kill someone and had to be stopped. The suspects, with TAYLOR driving, tore through the streets as a gun was tossed and interstates of Cheatham, Nashville and then into Mt. Juliet where he was finally, violently stopped and subdued. Pursuits are the most dangerous events and are not like you see on TV. They can be deadly to innocent people and are only necessary when a criminal escape would mean someone else would be likely injured or killed because of their increased violent criminality. Thankfully no injuries occurred on this very intense day as investigators and troopers alike performed professionally. Your Cheatham servants and Highway Patrol Troopers stuck it out in other jurisdictions to stop these dangerous criminals. Charges are pending in several counties for DENVER TAYLOR, BRITTANY HAMLIN and RAYMOND GARRETT IV. Maybe DENVER will stay in jail where he belongs...

SHERIFF’S REPORT: RUNAWAY INJURIES, ANOTHER SAD ENDING & MY PLEDGE Summertime is spent making memories for thousands of visitors who come to Cheatham and enjoy “A river that runs through it.” Your deputies are hired by the Army Corp to help oversee masses of water lovers. We only want safety on the water but when danger comes, we respond with a mission. It came this week when a runaway jet ski sped to the beach and ran over people. One victim was flighted out, two were transported and one treated at the scene. Your TWRA officers took charge with deputies and EMS choreographed a team effort of saving lives..charges are pending for the stupid guy. Ok, here’s the low down of deputies doing what they do in just a blip...An alarm on Indian Springs, A 10 month-old unresponsive on Whippoorwill, A suspicious vehicle on Owen, Males on bikes harassing on Harpeth Haven, An aggravated assault involving 3 suspects on Margo, A possible OD on Valley View, A stolen car on Luyben, Fighting going on at the constant problem motel on Luyben, Shooting on Little Marrowbone, An unconscious male on Oaklawn. Several people pulled over and warned for many traffic violations...ok, the second hour will come later. The man on Ruth Dr. fell and had been screaming for help for hours...someone heard and your deputies arrive to help him indeed. On Skyline, all was tranquil until the two women got into a fight over a phone. We arrived, took the report and updated the phone. She came home on Forrestwood and found the love of her life on the sidewalk. Stillness, unresponsive...gone. He was trying to put up the flag and fell off the ladder. Our solemn sadness for her when a simple chore changed everything. Sitting at my desk, staring at an official plan of action I was required to type up and respond to the State Fire Marshal was momentarily interrupted with my phone ringing. “This is Sheriff Bree…’I AM SO $%#DAMN MAD AT YOU AND YOUR DEPUTIES WHO DON’T DO $%IT! YOU AIN'T DONE A DAMN THING SINCE YOU BEEN IN OFFICE’..and the cursing continued because she was broken down and broken into again… ”Connie, I’m not going to talk to you while you continue to cuss me...I know you’re mad and you can call me back when you calm down.” Connie lives on a road with unsavory predators who hang around until they see her leave. She left on a day this week and the little she had was taken. We are working the case and will find the scoundrels. OUR AMERICAN WAY OF LIFE: We choose, by pulling a lever, who we believe will be the best choice. We walk in, sign the form and pull the curtain. We decide who is to be our representative, our voice, our decision maker. You chose me for another four years to insure your safety, to provide the best trained servants who will come in your moment of need. Four years ago, I openly stated, “If you’re a drug dealer, don’t vote for me…” They didn’t but you did. Many dealers have been jailed, left the county or simply stopped after we forced opened their doors. Some are dead from their own overdoses. But, we are still fighting this epidemic. Many Cheatham addicts are now travelling to Nashville. Some dealers show up in Cheatham and a few who brought death with them are sitting in our jail waiting for trial. Addicts in jail is not the answer but for some, the only way for them to find clarity and a repose for their family. They leave clean and have to decide if they want to revisit hell. The end to this madness is not in sight...not yet. I simply will continue to strive for the safest Cheatham ever because we have the most outstanding and determined team of professionals who have signed on to this mission. You pulled that lever of faith in your sheriff and I will honor my commitment to make Cheatham all the more safer because you are after all, our TeamCheatham.